No Chalk Allowed!

[Matt Reynolds]

Very well written and highly entertaining. I forget how bad public gyms are since I haven't been to one in 5 years or so, since owning STRONG.

[Nic Lane]

...and sip on Gin and Tonic in the card room after showering up.

Hmmm... I wouldn't mind if my gym swapped out the overpriced supplements with a swanky little bar. A nice G&T would probably help settle the old CNS after a set of heavy deads. And I've already gone on record with my position regarding the importance of beer as a source of chromium.

[Joel]

Outstanding article, MARINE!!

Semper Fi.

[mikeinmadrid]

This is the problem with Mark Rippetoe's programme and book. It can only be fully done in Wichita Falls Athletic club. Anyone else anywhere else has to make comprises.

[Jonathon Sullivan]

This is the problem with Mark Rippetoe's programme and book. It can only be fully done in Wichita Falls Athletic club. Anyone else anywhere else has to make comprises.

I approved this post specifically so I could tell you that you're a dumbfuck.

[Mark E. Hurling]

Great article. I saw a lot of gyms from the Chicago Health Clubs in the 70's to more recently that I worked out in. But as a matter of balance, I lift at a Gold's in CA. It has bumper plates, 4 power racks, and has never given me a hard time about the chalk bag I use discretely. The floors are black rubber composition and so would show chalk droppings immediately. But no grief from anyone there about it.

So then, what Sully said.

[PaulBeech]

Hah, what a silly remark by mikeinmadrid. I hope its sarcasm. I work and do my training at equinox and i can do every lift needed. I was very sceptical about applying but i was fully encouraged and ended up getting the job through my lifting knowledge. Its the last place i would have ever expected to be able to lift but its encouraged here. I acquired a client who had a powerlifting coach in the past and was told to just ask if we needed to use chains and bands! We have even ordered a collegiate style rack and platform and have been running a weightlifting club that is soon to be open to members. Its a cool place. It does totally depend on the management and style of the current trainers for each gym ive heard though.

[mikeinmadrid]

I approved this post specifically so I could tell you that you're a dumbfuck.

Well, your'e a dumbfuck too, Sullydog ;-)

I didn't say it was a bad programme. I didn't say that it was Rippetoe's fault. The programme is designed to be best strength programme, but if you can't implement it then there is a problem that needs to be addressed. If you don't have access to two spotters for a heavy squat; if you don't have access to power rack; if you have to workout at home etc. Then you can't do programme as written in the book. It's no good making fun of the only facilities people have to access to and calling them dumbfucks you dumbfuck!

[Jonathon Sullivan]

Well, your'e a dumbfuck too, Sullydog ;-)

Ouch. Great comeback. Well-played, sir.

The programme is designed to be best strength programme, but if you can't implement it then there is a problem that needs to be addressed.

A very penetrating observation.

If you don't have access to two spotters for a heavy squat; if you don't have access to power rack;

Ah. Squat racks and spotters. And don't forget the orangutan. Things vital to doing the program. Things that can only be found in Wichita Falls. Got it.

if you have to workout at home etc. Then you can't do programme as written in the book.

I did the novice program at home without a spotter on a cheap-ass squat rack and low-budget barbell set. And the Texas Method program, too. Or...I thought I did. Guess I have to start over now. In Wichita Falls.

It's no good making fun of the only facilities people have to access to and calling them dumbfucks you dumbfuck!

You're right. It's no good. You caught me in a bad mood; I'm just upset to discover that my lack of proximity to Texas means I'm NDTFP. In addition to missing out on real BBQ.

[Shaun J]

Hello everyone, thanks for reading the article and for your comments. While a little long, it could have been much longer had I elected to put all of the insanity I'd witnessed in there. Consider it the greatest hits if you will.

The article was really meant to be a satirical look at the ridiculous state of affairs in these places, act as a warning to anyone who hasn't experienced them yet, and convince myself it’s time to complete a home gym.

Also, a few examples that didn't make it in; how about the people is saw (plural) who would elevate the treadmill to its highest incline and then proceed to walk backwards on it? I'd like to think this was some sort of functional training exercise. Like they were tour guides for a hiking group and they want to lead the pack while keeping a close eye on all their folks at the same time. Luckily a treadmill was available to practice this motor skill.

And of course there's this guy.



That video was taken in a Utah Gold’s several years ago, and I do believe it just might be precisely what the Smith machine was designed for.
Anyhow, I'm glad some people were able to enjoy reading about my misadventures, thanks again for the comments and you'll likely see me around here in the future.