Training other people is how you actually learn about training. Do not train -- or rather, attempt to train -- your wife. You will not be successful.
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Training relatives
I have a family member that wants to be instructed in strength training, more specifically how to lift weights?
Even though I am not an instructor I do have a little knowledge, I will not go beyond what I know. Do I have your permission to at least try?
TMPHBITEU
Training other people is how you actually learn about training. Do not train -- or rather, attempt to train -- your wife. You will not be successful.
Member
Preach it . . . Preach . .Originally Posted by Mark Rippetoe
✓ Member
I train and coach Our Daughter. She was a quick and instinctive study on the SS method, unlike her father. She didn't have to unlearn and get deprogrammed from 50 years of shitty, stupid articles. Her squat form drifts into moderate incoherence from time to time, but she listened to me and took the cues to heart. She's a big strong young woman and is determined to get a lot stronger.
Dearly Beloved is too spooked by her hip and foot injuries to get under the iron these days. Maybe when she gets her hip replacement in what we hope is the near future, she'll be more amenable to it.
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That's like teaching your wife/girlfriend/SO how to shoot a firearm. Just don't do it. Some things are best left taught by a professional.
<---- CHL instructor for 6 years.
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Nope, not the Mrs, a little more distant. OK thanks.
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As a novice with an n = 3 experience with training friends / relatives who approached me, I would recommend against it. If they can't articulate what their goals are, or what they want to learn, then your ability to help them in a mutually satisfying way is very limited. If they can, then a coach would be very beneficial for them.
This doesn't mean that you can't help them, but if you are willing to proceed anyway, make sure you recognize what you are and aren't capable of doing. I worked with my brother, who is borderline obese, and two roommates, who are skinny fat. One of the biggest dangers here is that your pre-existing knowledge of them might cloud your ability to judge their physical prowess. My brother was having trouble with depth on squats, but sufficient yelling was all he needed, not mobility. He now sinks his squats by himself. My friends could sense my frustration when I couldn't coach them into a proper deadlift position, and although I was entirely disappointed in myself, they felt to blame. This is the sort of thing that can disrupt your interpersonal relationships, and for an amateur, the golden rule should be to first do no harm. This is my understanding of why Rip said nothing good can come out of coaching your wife / close relative.
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I can't even mention strength training to my wife anymore. She's a competitive amateur fencer. Apparently strength training is taboo in the fencing world because it destroys your flexibility. Every fencing coach she's ever had has told her not to lift heavy things. I guess that having a stronger press won't translate to being stronger on the blade, and the power clean won't result in a more explosive fleche.
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Has she read this article? Maybe just print out a copy, and leave it on the coffee table. See what happens.
Me too, although it's more fair to say we coach each other at this point. I know we're exceptions to the rule. I'm actually a little less comfortable yelling at friends, because it's easier to drop a friend who pisses you off than it is to divorce someone. Of course, it's not always flowers and puppies on a volume day, but as long as they know you're ultimately trying to help them, it makes it easier to accept criticism.
✓ Member
A long time ago Dearly Beloved and I had dinner with her best friend and her (then) weird-ass husband. I have no idea what set him off, but after dinner we got to talking about fencing in kind of a general manner. He challenged me to a match with a very intense stare asking if I was prepared to trust my life to a button on the end of the foil and the other protective gear. If I had had a brain in my head, I would have declined because he struck me as being as crazy as a shit house rat. But then I have never backed away from a challenge. So we geared up and engaged. At that time I never had any training in any kind of weapons then beyond firearms and batons. I beat him in every engagement. Apparently a very strong wrist and attached arms and shoulders can deflect and rebound off a very fast incoming point to take the attacker in the heart or head with ease. I had and have profoundly inflexible wrists and shoulders.
So perhaps the assumed sacred doctrines of faith in modern fencing may just be built on a sandy foundation.
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