Stuffed Superdud: Bumpy road to respectable lifting

[Coconut Chris]

Nice to see some continued PR's, and a captivating vignette of your life.

But you and Lil L are killing me, man. You can't just subtly hint at a bootycall, crash & burn, and then go suit shopping.

Please tell me you have some moves in reserve for when L's suit is finally chosen.

[brkriete]

Please tell me you have some moves in reserve for when L's suit is finally chosen.

"nice suit, it would look better in a crumpled ball next to my bed"

[stuffedsuperdud]

I missed training on M and W because Lyudmila's been pretty keen on hanging out way more than normal. Today she left early to go take a 4PM nap though, which freed me up to train.

Snatch (feeling good):
20kg x5
40x5x2
50x3
60x3
70x2
80x2x3
Lyudmila woke up from her four-hour nap at this point and started asking where I was, which was kind of distracting.
"I'm at the gym."
"Oooh that reminds me: I learned a new idiom today. Do you know what a brick shithouse is?"
"Yes. Like, some that lifts so he's like a square-ish outhouse, right? That's what I think, anyway. Not sure. No outhouses on this side of the Iron Curtain."
"Huh? Fuck you we had the same technology you had. Some of it was better. Besides, that's wrong! A shithouse is your ass, right? Because it houses your butthole? And when you lift weights it gets buff so it's like it's made out of bricks. So brick shithouse."
"Pretty sure an ass is not called a shithouse."
"You're wrong. Go train your shithouse."

Coach was like, "Okay asshole you've been trying to land that bootycall for like ten minutes now. It's not happening. Just lift."

85x2 Powered both of them by accident it felt so light.
90x1 Coach was like "Save that one to your mental hard drive. That's what a snatch is supposed to look like." High praise!
94x1
97x0x3 This fucking sucked. First two felt really easy getting overhead, but one slipped behind and the other in front. Coach reported no technical issues on the lift, and said I just need a stronger lockout. The third attempt was missed badly in front, and I was cut off here.

Back to business and false hopes.
"Hey I'm finishing up! What's up?" (Lies. I still had pulls)
"Nothing. I ate a huge sandwich and now I feel fat and I'm falling asleep again.... See you tomorrow."
Welp, didn't feel like doing pulls anymore.

CG: "LOLOLOL this new girl is just me! But I've seen Star Wars and I'm definitely not going to fuck you whereas she's only 99% not going to fuck you." Later: "Hahaha brick shithouse? Never heard that one. I'm a human 4x4!" Then she made a vroom sound and left for her MMA gym. hashtag coolgirls

[stuffedsuperdud]

Sunuva..... Went in pretty distracted mentally. Tried and failed.

Clean and jerk
20kg x many
40x3x2
60x2
80x2
90x1
100x1
105x1x2 both really ugly

Cleans were sloppy and I was coming onto my toes. Jerks were sloppy, with feet not landing in the correct place and soft elbows overhead. Worlds away from the 121 I did a few weeks ago. The lord giveth and the lord taketh away.

Clean deadlift:
120x5
130x5
150x3
160x6

Hey, here, have another Lyudmila-ism from the other day:

Monday, at dinner:
"....aaahhh I missed my nap. Now I feel like crap."
"It's okay. Want to take a nap here for a few minutes? You'll feel better."
"No...people will think I'm drunk...."
"Just close your eyes for ten minutes-"
"No! Stop being so pushy! You're just going to have to deal with cranky-me! Level 10 cranky!"
"Welp okay then."

Tuesday:
"Hey....you hungry?"
"Always. Did you nap?"
"Yes. I'm still cranky, but only a 6 so you're getting a 40% discount."

[idlehands]

Friends with Benefits (2011) - IMDb

[stuffedsuperdud]

Mindless grinding:
Clean:
20x many
40x5
60x3
80x2
90x2
95x2
100x2
105x2
110x2
didn't come onto toes or touch elbows to knee, so at least this is slightly on the up and up

Front squat:
60x5
100x3
110x3
120x3
130x3
whatever

[stuffedsuperdud]

I'm really tired.

Rushed training in surprise heat blast:
Snatch:
20kg x5
40x3x2
50x3
60x2
Made a comment to the coach here about how I've given up on dropping down to the 94s this time around and am hoping to just not accidentally break into SHW. "Why? What happenend?"
"I've been eating like an extra 1000 calories nearly every day for the past month or so."
"What do you mean?"
"Huh? Oh! Uh, I know this Russian girl who keeps on cooking and then asking me to come over to her place to eat."
"Uh, wait, are you fucking this girl?"
"So much nope."
"Okay, is she hot?"
"She's hot."
"I see. So a hot Russian girl keeps on making food and asking you to come over... Is she an immigrant?"
"Technically yes. But that was like ten years ago."
"Still. Okay, so a hot first generation Russian chick keeps on inviting you over for food. Dude, she wants to fuck."
"Say what?"
"You don't know this? It's the most basic trick. All immigrant girls do it. And non-damaged American girls. Which is an extinct species. Cooking is their way of showing they're a maternal provider."
"That's super redpill, bro-ton. I'm pretty sure she just doesn't like keeping leftovers."
"WTF is wrong with you? Do you have a problem with nice women or something? Wait does she just want a green card or something maybe?"
"She's a citizen."
"Boom. There you go. She wants the D."
Right then I got a text announcing the birth of some roast pork, chicken pasta, and cake. "Hey! Are you still at work? Come over now."
"Holy shit dude. Finish lifting and get over there."
All this cooled me right the fuck off and I did:
70x0,0,1
WTF?
Coach was like, "Uh....okay I've seen you muscle snatch this before...Aight your head is gone. Put the bar away and go get some."

Fucking plot twist:
Lyudmila came by my workstation today and was like, "Hey we need to start making plans for the next few weeks and probably summer too since I'll be around and all." What? TL;DR she got cold feet and told the HR folks in Colorado thanks but no thanks maybe later. More life! For her first order of business she got us Bryan Adams tickets, which I guess won't kill me.

[Simon Rest]

"I'm at the gym."
"Oooh that reminds me: I learned a new idiom today. Do you know what a brick shithouse is?"
"Yes. Like, some that lifts so he's like a square-ish outhouse, right? That's what I think, anyway. Not sure. No outhouses on this side of the Iron Curtain."
"Huh? Fuck you we had the same technology you had. Some of it was better. Besides, that's wrong! A shithouse is your ass, right? Because it houses your butthole? And when you lift weights it gets buff so it's like it's made out of bricks. So brick shithouse."
"Pretty sure an ass is not called a shithouse."
"You're wrong. Go train your shithouse."

As an Australian I can assure you a "brick shithouse" is an outhouse of masonry construction, and the term "built like a brick shithouse" is used to describe someone of large muscular proportions.

Also I agree with your coach - she's cooking for you because she's trying to win you over. Possibly because she think's she fucked up by getting blackout drunk on your first date and then throwing up over everything.

[manveer]

Saw a girl named Sabrina Nichole on Instagram. Did a bit more research. Found video evidence that a man need not be physically fit (or well hung) to be with women of a "high ranking" (8.5+).

You had to do research to figure this out?

[idlehands]

Hasn't everyone been saying this though ?