Great log man - your style of writing is very entertaining and fun to read!
Also, get that girl bro - she sounds nice.
Yesterday I did:
clean + jerk 1+3
20kg x 10?
40x1
50x1
60x1
70x1
80x1
90x1
Front squat:
60x5
90x5
100x5
110x3 paused
120x3 paused
legs felt fine but upper back proved the bottleneck.
Today:
"Asheville-to-Nashville-2017" got rained out but I had to spend the whole day trying to help Lyudmila assemble a wardrobe for her new desk job. Jesus Christ what a fucking pain in the ass. Her closet has nothing but t-shirts, jeans, shorts, a smattering of cold-weather gear, a cardigan, two pairs of sneakers, and like 3,000 booties and 5,000 penny loafers. Oh, and two suits I helped her get a few months ago, one in black and one in mid gray. She needed to supplement these two because she has to wear a suit or a nice dress every day from now on.
The male equivalent of this situation:
Blue suit with jacket that can double as blazer
Bolder patterned suit that can be broken into separates (plaid? windowpane?)
Odd wool trousers (tan gabardine, gray flannel)
Black captoe oxford
Brown derby
...and you're done
The women's side is fucking bullshit:
Most tailored garments are made from coarse polyester blends
It is exceedingly difficult to find timeless classic styles because fast fashion dominates and makers have to release weird items for the sake of novelty in their terrible game of timed obsolescence
All women's shoes are badly made and come in tacky designs
Additional complications
Lil L has gigantic boobs so fitting a jacket sucks, but is flat everywhere else, so fitting pants sucks. She also wants everything to fit her unusual figure properly off the rack and doesn't have a good sense of what amount of slop can be fixed by paying the tailor tax, e.g. taking in the waist is easy, so if that doesn't fit, it's fine, while altering the shoulder is a bitch so get that right from the start
Her feet are chunky domes so almost all shoes are too sleek and pinch
She has tons of faith in overpriced designer labels popular in Europe, e.g. Armani and Hugo Boss, while suspicious of middle-tier staples from places like Nordy or J.Crew, which provide the best bang for buck
She's also suspicious of online shopping even with free shipping/returns, and insists on trying everything on in person. This last part I understand, but it doesn't make my life easier.
Lyudmila's foreign sensibilities insist that black is the only appropriate color, and she doesn't know how to mix or match patterns/colors. It was a powerful learning experience for me because I hit walls with lots of things I took for granted, e.g. I suggested a navy blue suit that could be broken up.
"Broken up how?"
"Like, you can wear the jacket it with pants or a skirt of any color, e.g. gray, brown, tan, burgundy, etc."
"No! No you can't. For that you need one of those with the gold buttons and then it only works with khakis."
"You just described some WASP douchebag."
"Yes. And I'm not that."
"Okay, so skip the gold buttons. But blue really does match with lots of stuff."
"No. And what, do I wear a gray shirt? too?"
"Well, no. But we can find you a dress shirt. Like this one here. Oxford cloth, light blue."
"That looks like one of your shirts. I don't like dress shirts."
And so on and so on. Sales is hard, yo. At Saks or Nieman or something, one employee asked another employee about who it was that wanted the little black dress, size 8. "Oh, that girl over there. The one that came in with the stylist." That's me!! New career? All day today people mistook me for an employee so after a while I was like "fuck it" and started selling things. Moved about $900 of merchandise? Not great compared to the several thousand that a good salesman would push at Nordstrom, but for someone doing it accidentally? Hell yea.
As a result of all of these shenanigans, we ended up scouring every mall / outlet mall in the DMV area and some outside the beltway as far as Leesburg. The Leesburg outlet is particularly painful because the stores stock mostly crap made specifically for outlets, not true leftovers from last season, and the whole thing is outdoors so we're shuffling along under the sun.
However: TWO LIFESAVERS.
1. Theory is about as close as it gets for tailored garments. Still some poly materials mixed in, but the styles are classic, and available in jacket-pants-vest-skirt combos. Lil L came away with a blue suit, two little black dresses, and a medium gray three-piece suit. They didn't quite have the overcoat she wanted (nipped waist with front darts, 3/4 length, camel-colored wool-cashmere) but many were close. Maybe as winter gets closer.... I told her the LBD would look great on my bedroom floor. She told me it probably wouldn't ever work out between us because she lacks the twin sister for my three-way fantasies.
2. She saw the light with Banana Republic and J.Crew! And came away with some brown, medium blue, and gray wool pants and a flannel dress.
As I tried to call it a night she went, "So...what time tomorrow? I need shirts and a shoes still." We're going to need more caffeine.
waywt:
Navy linen jacket from the Nordstrom suit
Orange-white check shirt, CT
541s, the rich
Walnut Strands, now with red Dainite + matching belt
Tomorrow, it's time to get a bit more wild....
Great log man - your style of writing is very entertaining and fun to read!
Also, get that girl bro - she sounds nice.
Sunday was fucking miserable, as Lil L couldn't find a single damn pair of plain black low-heel pumps that fit. Well, it could have been a lot worse, but I had the foresight to stuff her full of diner food first to prevent any hangry meltdowns, and then off we went to commence the trainwreck. This woman has super high-end tastes bordering on CG levels, but is also extremely tightfisted with her $$, which can be conflicting! See also the aforementioned problem with nothing fitting her funny feet. So we started at Frye (where she went, "This is good stuff! All made in the USA too!"....I didn't bother telling her no to both points...) where she badly stretched out a demo ballet flat they had. We left but that ended up being the promising lead of the day and it was all downhill from there. The next several hours were a blur, but I do remember at some point trying to hang myself while she trundled around a showroom in a boner-killing pair of Rockports boots similar to my mom's. Also failed at: Clarks, J&M, Macy's, J.Crew, Banana Republic, and then the heavier hitters: Bloomies, Neiman, Saks, and Nordstrom. The first three I knew would be pushing $700 piles of high fashion bullshit but humored her anyway, but I held out great hope for reliable old Nordstrom. Customer service was superb as usual, and they really tried hard to find something for her, but alas she was too picky and rejected their finds based on unfair criteria: her tests for quality consisted of checking the seams of the leather for any signs of glue and then bending the toe back a full 180 degrees and checking for any creasing in the leather. Just now she sent me an excited text telling me she finally found some staple items........at Target. Big red comes through..
Less talky more lifty:
Squat:
20kg x 10
60x8
100x5
140x3
160x3
170x3
180x3
190x2 missed the 3rd rep!! First missed squat in over a year blaaaah.
Press:
20x 10
40x5
50x5
Coach noticed some asymmetry due to an apparently loss of strength in the right arm from my babying it these past six months and switched me to kettlebell presses with a 12kg bell. The asymmetry became painfully obvious then, as this was quite easy with the left side but not the right. Guess this is on the menu from now on. Fear not, Rippetoeneans*, I'm still going to do my presses.
*I like how after the great rapture, I am now one of the strongest people on this site. Wheeeeeee cya wouldn't wanna be ya Gilchrest and Manveer! The non-SSC technique section is kinda sad though with the 275lb squatters mansplaining to the 95lb squatters. Or as the owner of my old gym used to go, "There's nothing more insufferable than the guy who just benched 225 or squatted 315."
But what about all my fans here??!?! I need my own blog....
Today: (remedial training)
lots of elbow MOB
Press:
20kg x5
40x5
50x5
60x5
63x5
Coached noticed the asymmetry in my shoulders flaring up and switched me to one arm upside down kettle bell presses, 12kg x5x4 for each arm, with extra slow eccentric and a pause at the bottom of the right arm to let the weight force the elbow into an extra bit of flexion.
Rack jerk:
20kg x many
40x3
50x3
60x3
70x3
80x3
90x3
95x3x3
Jerks haven't felt this comfortable for as long as I can remember. Good rack, good lockout. Now just need to do with actual weight...
Front squat:
60x5
90x5
100x5
110x5
120x2x2
Now these did not feel comfortable. Legs thought it was easy but my upper back didn't like anything past rep 2 and the rack started falling apart.
It's Thursday so of course Lil L is planning my weekend already. Maybe that uber driver was right and I have an accidental wife.
Bad day today:
snatch
20kg x many
40x3
50x3
60x3
70x3
80x3
85x2 rushed the 2nd one and missed it
90x0x3 fucking bullshit. Got all 3 overhead, but couldn't stabilize and lost them behind. Coach said I am letting it crash down on me instead of actively locking it out. We think I was able to get away with it before due to limited shoulder mobility, but now the weight is free to drift backward so I have to consciously fight for it.
80x3
Then Lil L wanted to eat so I had to GTFO and go find her. She came straight from work in an outfit that I put together last week: blue blazer, pink shirt, medium blue glen plaid pants, black wedge heels. CG: "Are you sure you're not at least a little bit bi-curious?"
Widened my clean grip but about 1" and did:
clean:
20kg x many
40x3x2
50x3
60x3
70x3
80x3
90x1 (missed #2!!! lightest clean ever missed?)
90x3
Kettlebell work for shoulders and elbows.
I'm pretty tired; will be more entertaining later, hopefully.
So maybe my next side hustle will be as some sort of stylist? I've been helping Lyudmila revamp her wardrobe, and she's been killing it. As a reference, she was previously in dirty sweatshirts, faded jeans, and Sketchers sneakers all day every day.
On Friday she showed up in:
Navy blazer, Theory
Pink silk shirt...more Theory
RAF blue glen plaid trousers, Banana Republic
Black wedge heels, Target?! (she found these on her own)
We were at a bar and I was beating back douchebags; this never used to happen.
On Saturday:
Navy silk blouse...also from Theory. Those guys are turning into lifesavers
Black wool trousers, Banana Republic
Silver heels
I'm a goddamn genius
I didn't want to deal with douchebags a second time, so I had to armor up with:
Midnight blue velvet dinner jacket (SuitSupply so yea a bit too snug in the arms but whatevs it was basically free)
Pique front tux shirt (TM Lewin)
Black flannel tux pants (Polo RL)
Black satin bow tie + cummerbund TheTieBar (go here, gais!)
Black silk socks Jos A Bank lolwut?! These were $5 a pop and I am sorry I only bought three pairs, as they are no longer available.
Black Washington Square austerity brogues (AE natch)
So basically, black tie with two modifications, the jacket and the shoes. We were at the Kennedy Center, so while this wasn't entirely out of place, the unofficial men's dress code is a baggy blazer left unbuttoned and a equally baggy pair of khakis or gray trousers. But those guys are 6'1" 185 and handsome, so I have to work harder to stay even.
Keith Churchwell, MD is still the master of black-tie-with-a-twist though:
If anyone has any tux questions now is a good time because I am fucking tired of seeing guys mess up what was originally intended as a foolproof uniform for after-hours.
On Sunday, Szymon appeared wearing a dark gray suit made out of material torn from a 1980s couch cushion, a linen shirt untucked, and these fucking things:
I once helped out at an organization fitting ex-cons and homeless men with gently used suits so that they could go on job interviews, and they all looked 10x better than Szymon's bullshit. I told him he and I are going to sort this out (the good thing about him is he's actually quite wealthy somehow, so $$ is no matter. He's just too much of an absent-minded scientist) and he insists that we start by getting him a dark green shirt to go with his suit "because it brings out the flecks in my eyes." I am starting to think that 90% of a stylist's job is to reconcile that which is aesthetically pleasing with his clients' eccentricities and poor tastes.
Training:
Coach has me doing remedial overhead work still.
Snatch push press with slow eccentric:
20kg x5
40x5
50x5
60x5
70x5
80x5
90x5
some kettlebell nonsense
I'm still here, even though it seems like the serious lifters section was hit particularly hard by the E&P troubles.....
....not that I'm a serious lifter...
Snatch:
20kg x5
40x3
50x3
60x3
70x2
80x2
85x2
90x1
92x2
80x2
85x0x2 Coach tried to make a small adjustment in my technique which threw me off
77x1
Snatch balance:
20x3
40x3
50x3
60x3
70x3
The right elbow started flaring up here, and my left wrist, which has been bugging me a little for a few weeks now, got upset too, so we cut it off here.
Rule 34 Lite:
Ladies in Suits: It suits them fine.