How to Talk to Your Friends and Family About Strength Training | Andrew Lewis

[stef]

"It can be frustrating to try to help friends or family members start lifting. It's obvious that strength training will help them improve their lives and health, but they seem so resistant to the idea. The problem is that they are at a different stage of idea acceptance than you."

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[Tom Ives]

To make health and lifestyle improvements that are effective and lasting, I think it is crucial that people develop confidence that 1) success is possible and 2) there is a methodology they can follow that will lead them to that success.

Witnessing my brother's personal health success and his physical transformation through barbell training gave me that confidence. For years, I "knew" I needed to return to exercise and training. No amount of reminding or well-intentioned encouragement would have changed my behavior (or lack thereof). Life always seemed to have had more urgent priorities. Over the years, due to lack of discipline and lack of access to an effective training methodology, I had started different exercise programs with little or no tangible results.

I had not seen my brother for a year or so when I saw his tremendous physical transformation. He was "jacked" as they say! He accomplished this through a compound-lift barbell training program (although it was not Starting Strength). At once, I was convinced that successful health transformation was indeed possible (my brother had done it!) and that there existed a pathway that actually worked that I could follow so that I too could achieve success. I started training immediately, and I have not stopped since. Several months later, I discovered Starting Strength.

Andrew describes many tools we can use to help persuade those for whom we care to adopt healthier lifestyles. I think some of the most effective ways we can do that are by exhibiting our own physical and health achievements (whether that is physical transformation or improvements in performing the physical functional skills of life) and by making people aware that barbell training (specifically, through Starting Strength) is what enabled us to accomplish those achievements.

[adamwilliford1173]

Excellent article Andrew! I've definitely struggled with this and have made some mistakes that you list above when trying to recruit my Dad or wife to start strength training.

[dalan]

To add to what Tom said, even if we know strength training is good for them; even if THEY know that strength training is good for them...they have to have some kind of interest in it. For instance, I hate running with a passion. I will never run unless I'm being chased by someone or something badder than me and even then I'll try something else first. No amount of coaxing or insisting will change my mind nor will stories of how awesome and life chamging running is. Some people feel that way about lifting weights.

[AndrewLewis]

To add to what Tom said, even if we know strength training is good for them; even if THEY know that strength training is good for them...they have to have some kind of interest in it. For instance, I hate running with a passion. I will never run unless I'm being chased by someone or something badder than me and even then I'll try something else first. No amount of coaxing or insisting will change my mind nor will stories of how awesome and life chamging running is. Some people feel that way about lifting weights.

Perhaps after you start training, yes, but I don't know how you could dislike something you've never done. There are many people who hate squatting because it hurts their knees, but I would say they haven't really squatted correctly. I have relatives who hated strength training, but after reframing it in their minds as having tangible and quantitative goals, it changed everything.

Excellent article Andrew! I've definitely struggled with this and have made some mistakes that you list above when trying to recruit my Dad or wife to start strength training.

Thanks. I'm glad you liked it.

[Sib]

Perhaps after you start training, yes, but I don't know how you could dislike something you've never done. There are many people who hate squatting because it hurts their knees, but I would say they haven't really squatted correctly. I have relatives who hated strength training, but after reframing it in their minds as having tangible and quantitative goals, it changed everything.



Thanks. I'm glad you liked it.

Great article. If someone is overweight, has diabetes and backpain and keeps making it worse with diet and inaction there is often some depression lurking under the surface. You don't help a depressed person by beating them in an argument about the cause of their problems.

[Robert Cosenza]

Nice article.
You’ve read Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss.
I recommend everyone read this book.