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Thread: Training Advice or Alterations for New Fathers

  1. #11
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    Feb 2019
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    • starting strength seminar april 2024
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    Congratulations!
    Don’t make my mistake of being completely inactive when your kids are very young. It is hard to keep training and you may need to adjust your schedule (more qualified people will advise about the specifics than me). But there is a perception that good fathers are just at work and sat around with the baby but maintaining your physical strength will be worth the 2-3 hours you take out of your week.
    Good Luck!

  2. #12
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    Apr 2021
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sebastian Ohanian View Post
    Is your baby on a sleep schedule? At 5 mos, the baby should be sleeping through the night 12+ hours.
    She is slowly developing some resemblance of a schedule. Still waking up 2-3 times per night for feeding/diaper changes however. On average she is totaling around 10-12 hours a night now.

  3. #13
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    Jun 2020
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    How to Train Without A Plan - Andy Baker

    I've leaned on this as a minimum-time way to get under the bar a little when I'm facing serious time or recovery constraints. Take a single, do a couple of backoffs, and done. I wouldn't want to train hard if I was still waking up a few times a night. Both my kids were good sleepers; I was very fortunate.

  4. #14
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    Ughhh....I remember those days. But honestly, the family comes first. Give them the quality time. Trust me, you will have plenty of time to train consistently later but put the wife and baby first in terms of where you expend your limited time and energy. That’s putting money in the bank, to a marriage that works and a family.

    When my twins were little I would try to train consistently but it was a losing battle in every way. My wife would get pissed because there was always house work to do, and if I am lifting then that housework has to be done by her.
    She may not verbalize it but she won’t be happy with that. I had to rush my workouts and not get adequate rest between sets, let alone insufficient rest.

    That’s not to say don’t train. Definitely train if and when you can, but lower your training goals or at least be realistic about them. Your recovery will be limited so accept the fact to your strength will be far less than optimal. But it’s not forever.

  5. #15
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    Feb 2018
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    Quote Originally Posted by Waffle Socks View Post
    She is slowly developing some resemblance of a schedule. Still waking up 2-3 times per night for feeding/diaper changes however. On average she is totaling around 10-12 hours a night now.
    That is good news, and even better news if she goes to sleep easily. Our first was a terrible sleeper -- my wife barely slept at all for 8 months with her. We came across Sleep Sense Program - The Sleep Sense Program by Dana Obleman and FINALLY got her to sleep. When baby 2 came along we were ready for battle, and the boy would just go to sleep and stay that way.

    I didn't start training until baby 5 was on her way, and by then we had a pretty good rhythm established. Getting up and training first thing in the morning (moving as quietly as possible so as not to wake Mom or baby) was the only way I could make it work. Working from home helped a lot, too, as I had more flexibility in how my day flowed.

    Good luck, and do what you can to keep the habit until things settle down!

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by TommyGun View Post
    Ughhh....I remember those days. But honestly, the family comes first. Give them the quality time. Trust me, you will have plenty of time to train consistently later but put the wife and baby first in terms of where you expend your limited time and energy. That’s putting money in the bank, to a marriage that works and a family.

    When my twins were little I would try to train consistently but it was a losing battle in every way. My wife would get pissed because there was always house work to do, and if I am lifting then that housework has to be done by her.
    She may not verbalize it but she won’t be happy with that. I had to rush my workouts and not get adequate rest between sets, let alone insufficient rest.

    That’s not to say don’t train. Definitely train if and when you can, but lower your training goals or at least be realistic about them. Your recovery will be limited so accept the fact to your strength will be far less than optimal. But it’s not forever.
    100% agree. To be honest, especially if your wife doesn't train, she will resent you for doing so. Just stop until the kids are older and you have enough time for yourself to devote to it.

  7. #17
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    Feb 2020
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    Hey Waffle!

    You may have all this figured out already but I think the first thing you need to focus on is optimizing the sleep schedule.

    - Setting up shifts and taking turns is much better than both of you getting up at once.
    - Let the parent who is "off duty" sleep somewhere else so they can actually get sleep
    - Stagger your sleep schedules - one goes to bed earlier the other one later

    I've had three kids myself (so far) and I have done it the right way and the wrong way. If you be strategic and don't get too hung up on the "romantic" part of being a new parent you will fare much better. My first one was a nightmare. The rest where way easier because we worked on making the whole process as efficient as possible.

    As to your training, if you're able to get your sleep and nutrition there is no reason why you can't continue to follow the program. Don't be scared to take your daughter into the gym with you. Most of the time I am training I have my two year old with me. He knows the rules and he even likes helping me collar my barbell from time to time. Most days I am training and working at the same time. You may mot have that kind of flexibility but don't be scared to break up your workout throughout the day if you have to.

    You can do it! It's hard but it's within your ability to train just as hard as you did before your daughter was born. It just takes more planning. A lot more....

  8. #18
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    Apr 2021
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    This is all really good advice. I remember coming across that article from Andy Baker a while back but now it’s much more relevant to my life situation.

    I may try to switch to early morning training. We just got back from our daughters cleft repair surgery. The overnight stay at the hospital was interesting - only 1 crib and recliner in the room so I had to sleep in the bathtub (Mom got the recliner). Needless to say my back is a little iffy today....

  9. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Waffle Socks View Post
    This is all really good advice. I remember coming across that article from Andy Baker a while back but now it’s much more relevant to my life situation.

    I may try to switch to early morning training. We just got back from our daughters cleft repair surgery. The overnight stay at the hospital was interesting - only 1 crib and recliner in the room so I had to sleep in the bathtub (Mom got the recliner). Needless to say my back is a little iffy today....
    I've found that early mornings are the only time I can count on to be consistent.

    Hope your little girl is feeling better! That's a rough thing to have to do.

  10. #20
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    Sep 2018
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    Quote Originally Posted by mitchless View Post
    That is good news, and even better news if she goes to sleep easily. Our first was a terrible sleeper -- my wife barely slept at all for 8 months with her. We came across Sleep Sense Program - The Sleep Sense Program by Dana Obleman and FINALLY got her to sleep. When baby 2 came along we were ready for battle, and the boy would just go to sleep and stay that way.

    I didn't start training until baby 5 was on her way, and by then we had a pretty good rhythm established. Getting up and training first thing in the morning (moving as quietly as possible so as not to wake Mom or baby) was the only way I could make it work. Working from home helped a lot, too, as I had more flexibility in how my day flowed.

    Good luck, and do what you can to keep the habit until things settle down!
    The book we used was Moms on Call. You could also purchase some service with it where you would be able to speak to a "professional" about anything baby related. Baby should not be waking up 2-3 times a night at this point. Both of mine slept through the night at 2 months, which is amazing, but doable. The service might be worth it for you so they can help coming up with a new schedule for you. Just a thought, best of luck.

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