Joined a new gym last night. Hilarious Joined a new gym last night. Hilarious - Page 2417

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Thread: Joined a new gym last night. Hilarious

  1. #24161
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    Aug 2019
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    • wichita falls texas december seminar 2020
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    Quote Originally Posted by Matt James View Post
    Here's a still from my most recent squat workout.

    Attachment 7357


    I can totally understand.

  2. #24162
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    May 2020
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    There isn't a single gym in a 30 minute commute that passes the chalk test. Heck, there isn't even one with multiple squat racks.

    This is the story of the "last straw" at each of these locations. I'm so glad to finally have run out of gyms to try, and convinced my dear husband to replace our dining room with a home gym.

    First gym: a rock climbing gym with a pretty sweet Rogue rig. The problem? The top of the rig doubled as monkey bars, and people were constantly complaining my bar got in the way of their legs. So in between sets I'd have to completely unload the bar so I could set it on the ground for them to do their monkey bar nonsense. Then reset.

    Second gym: hadn't been updated since the 80s. Still had that sick patterned carpet and everything. It didn't even have a squat rack, it was more one of those angled thingies with pegs and a set safety stop.
    These two girls from the local community college were on my exact gym schedule but would always beat me by 15 minutes and hog the squat rack. Not to squat... To film each other performing hip thrusts. Nevermind that there was a large open room nearby to do it in. Nevermind that the squat rack actually kind of got in their way. They had to do it in the squat rack. And between the multiple film takes and the hair touch ups, they took well over an hour. I complained to management, and the girls switched to doing good mornings. Still in the squat rack.
    At great personal sacrifice I tried changing my gym time to the morning. Only to find myself smack in the middle of senior citizen social hour. I was the youngest person in there by 50 years. And turns out, when you're 80 you don't give a shit about openly oggling a girl. Also, you don't care about deoderant. It was just too uncomfortable.

    Third gym: one of those tiny 24 hour things. They said a rig with 4 racks, I said sign me up. Turns out that 2 of the racks had equipment placed directly in front of them and were unusable, so that brings us down to 2. That was sufficient on Saturday when we toured. But turns out this place has a booming "group personal exercising" (I refuse to call it training) business. So during the week, the trainers reserve both racks for 5 hours at a time, with barbells loaded to about 65 pounds and clients doing quarter squats and other nonsense. Actually, they mostly used the bars as something to grab onto for inverted rows. And I was categorically admonished for asking them if I could steal one for 20 minutes. Also, one of the personal exercisers had the worst cackling hyena laughs of all time. It penetrated my over-ear noise cancelling headphones. And she laughed probably once every 3 minutes. It was enough to cause you to misgroove a set.

    Fourth gym: a CrossFit gym that let you use the squat racks during open gym. I asked them where the safety bars were and they sneered at me. Turns out they're too cool for them. At that point I was so desperate I just decided to give CrossFit a try. 6 months later my thyroid quit on me.

    Last gym: walked up to the window, looked inside, saw a guy curling in the only squat rack, turned around and went home.

  3. #24163
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    Jul 2017
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    Awesome. I'm not sure which gym was the worst. Congrats on the home gym!

  4. #24164
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    Aug 2019
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elle View Post
    There isn't a single gym in a 30 minute commute that passes the chalk test. Heck, there isn't even one with multiple squat racks.

    This is the story of the "last straw" at each of these locations. I'm so glad to finally have run out of gyms to try, and convinced my dear husband to replace our dining room with a home gym.

    First gym: a rock climbing gym with a pretty sweet Rogue rig. The problem? The top of the rig doubled as monkey bars, and people were constantly complaining my bar got in the way of their legs. So in between sets I'd have to completely unload the bar so I could set it on the ground for them to do their monkey bar nonsense. Then reset.

    Second gym: hadn't been updated since the 80s. Still had that sick patterned carpet and everything. It didn't even have a squat rack, it was more one of those angled thingies with pegs and a set safety stop.
    These two girls from the local community college were on my exact gym schedule but would always beat me by 15 minutes and hog the squat rack. Not to squat... To film each other performing hip thrusts. Nevermind that there was a large open room nearby to do it in. Nevermind that the squat rack actually kind of got in their way. They had to do it in the squat rack. And between the multiple film takes and the hair touch ups, they took well over an hour. I complained to management, and the girls switched to doing good mornings. Still in the squat rack.
    At great personal sacrifice I tried changing my gym time to the morning. Only to find myself smack in the middle of senior citizen social hour. I was the youngest person in there by 50 years. And turns out, when you're 80 you don't give a shit about openly oggling a girl. Also, you don't care about deoderant. It was just too uncomfortable.

    Third gym: one of those tiny 24 hour things. They said a rig with 4 racks, I said sign me up. Turns out that 2 of the racks had equipment placed directly in front of them and were unusable, so that brings us down to 2. That was sufficient on Saturday when we toured. But turns out this place has a booming "group personal exercising" (I refuse to call it training) business. So during the week, the trainers reserve both racks for 5 hours at a time, with barbells loaded to about 65 pounds and clients doing quarter squats and other nonsense. Actually, they mostly used the bars as something to grab onto for inverted rows. And I was categorically admonished for asking them if I could steal one for 20 minutes. Also, one of the personal exercisers had the worst cackling hyena laughs of all time. It penetrated my over-ear noise cancelling headphones. And she laughed probably once every 3 minutes. It was enough to cause you to misgroove a set.

    Fourth gym: a CrossFit gym that let you use the squat racks during open gym. I asked them where the safety bars were and they sneered at me. Turns out they're too cool for them. At that point I was so desperate I just decided to give CrossFit a try. 6 months later my thyroid quit on me.

    Last gym: walked up to the window, looked inside, saw a guy curling in the only squat rack, turned around and went home.
    Do cross fits not have power racks? Would be tricky to dump a low bar squat every time you fail.

  5. #24165
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    Quote Originally Posted by danomite! View Post
    I workout at work or in my garage so I don't often get to experience the wonders others see within this thread. The kiddos are playing in basketball leagues at the local YMCA and I'm there a couple times a week watching them. There is a small group (3-4) of what appears to be a branch of a crossfit cult that uses part of the gym for their workouts. They did all manner of silly BS but the one that stood out to me was what I'll now refer to as Swiss ball thighmaster metronomes. The leader of the group was laying on his back with his legs in the air and bent 90 deg at the knee. He had a swiss ball gripped between his knees. He would then move the ball back & forth from 10:00 to 2:00 in line with his body (no side to side motion). I wasn't sure what he was doing but I'm not so sure he knew what he was doing either. Maybe it works some obscure ab muscle that no one outside of his cult knows about.
    I had a book once about core functional training (actually it still in my bomb shelter). All sorts of swiss ball stretches and active warm ups in it. This was one of them. With some shame, I will admit to having done this exact stretch.

  6. #24166
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    May 2020
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    Quote Originally Posted by alsbos View Post
    Do cross fits not have power racks? Would be tricky to dump a low bar squat every time you fail.
    This one only had one of those wall rigs with the two uprights, no catch bars or racks you can stand inside. I think that's pretty common with CrossFit because they believe in front squats and/or extremely upright back squats where dumping the bar is stressful but not dangerous.

  7. #24167
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    Aug 2019
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    Homeschooling inside a power rack.

    I had to keep my power rack in the kid's bedroom due to space constraints. This is what happens

    YouTube

  8. #24168
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    Jan 2018
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    Enjoy every minute you can with your kids,.
    In what will seem like just a few weeks they grow up and you will wish they were still little and around.

    Itís the best time of your life when you look back at it.

  9. #24169
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    Jul 2017
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    Quote Originally Posted by alsbos View Post
    I had a book once about core functional training (actually it still in my bomb shelter). All sorts of swiss ball stretches and active warm ups in it. This was one of them. With some shame, I will admit to having done this exact stretch.
    Nooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!! Though seriously that was actually in a book? Please let me know if there is a name for them. lol

  10. #24170
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    Quote Originally Posted by bobman View Post
    Enjoy every minute you can with your kids,.
    In what will seem like just a few weeks they grow up and you will wish they were still little and around.

    It’s the best time of your life when you look back at it.
    Quote Originally Posted by bobman View Post
    Enjoy every minute you can with your kids,.
    In what will seem like just a few weeks they grow up and you will wish they were still little and around.

    It’s the best time of your life when you look back at it.
    True.

    Now I realise that going to a commercial gym was a real ordeal. Traffic, finding a parking lot, waiting for a power rack - it used to take about 3 hours everyday.... Now I get to spend at least an additional 9 hours with my kids. While working out, my 3 year old counts my reps. When she is in the mood, we even work in between - her squat form is hilarious

    My 9 year old isn't as enthusiastic, but he likes to do the camera for my form check videos. He is now working on his chin triples.

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