Joined a new gym last night. Hilarious Joined a new gym last night. Hilarious

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Thread: Joined a new gym last night. Hilarious

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
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    Fayetteville, Arkansas
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    1,209

    Default Joined a new gym last night. Hilarious

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    So I managed to get a good deal with a local "commercial" type of gym. You know, the one with Les Mills classes and Hammer Strength equipment. My wife really wanted a gym that allowed her to do those stupid classes and run.

    I only had a few questions for the guy. Where is the squat rack? Where can I deadlift? How do you feel about chalk? All good answers so I said, what the hey and signed up. No contract and it only costs 43.00 for my wife and I per month.

    So i've literally JUST got in the locker room. I'm putting on my shorts and my Chuck Taylors next to this other guy who's also dressing out. He looks over at me and says, "You wear your Chucks to workout in? Man, I tried to do that once, but my heels just wouldn't move at all in them. The soles were way too hard!"

    Naturally, I almost laughed out loud. I then tried to explain to him that that was the exact reason I use them to squat in and that shoes with a squishy heel weren't good for that reason. He just responded with, "Oh, okay. Well that makes sense."

    There I was just doing my sets on bench press and waiting for my clock to hit at the 5 minute mark. In walks this guy that weighs probably 180#. He's cut, looks like he's at least been lifting for a while. The first thing I notice is his shirt. He's wearing one of those tees that is supposed to look like the sleeves are cut off. The collar is still intact, but you can nearly see his nipples from the way it is cut. The next thing I noticed was that his calves were about the size of my biceps. I don't even have huge biceps...

    I'm watching him, and you'll never guess the very first exercise that he starts doing. That's right, bicep curls. He sits down, grabs a 25# dumbell in each hand and begins to pump these out for the next 30 minutes. He doesn't change the weight at all and I think he kept losing count because he had to have done at least 100 reps on each arm. The entire time I was there I never saw him do another exercise.

    While doing some deadlifts back by the squat racks, these 2 guys walk in the gym together and make a b-line for the squat rack next to me(I guess that's what you'd call it. It was one of those Hammer Strength ones...). These 2 guys are fairly built so i'm hoping against hope that they are about to rep out some decent squats. Yeah...right.

    Instead, they grab one of those bright green platforms for the Les Mills Body Step class and stick it in the rack. I'm thinking, okay, maybe they're gonna do some deadlifts then. They do.

    All the while, i'm working up to 270 in front of them. I keep watching as they add more weight to the bar after every set of 10. I finally get ready to do my workset(270x1x5) and they are putting their last load on the bar as well. I count it up and it maxes out at 190lbs. As i'm resting to get this heavy ass load off the floor, I can hear them talking amongst themselves. "Dude, just remember, this is what our grip failed on last time so we've gotta make sure that we don't let that happen again!" The other replies, "Nah, I think it was a little more than this." This is when one of them pulls out some of those cotton wrist straps, "just in case."

    I almost shit my pants from trying not to laugh directly at them as i'm getting ready to lift 270# 5 times off the floor.

    Oh yes, I almost forgot about the guys doing their heavy "squats." As i'm warming up on the squat rack, there are these 2 guys next to me just going to town. They're screaming like they're about to prolapse and it is the heaviest thing in the world. Both of these guys are bigger than me and they are REALLY into this weight.

    The whole thing wouldn't have been nearly as comical had they actually been using a real bar, squatted more than 1/4 of the way down, and not been on the Smith Machine while they did it. And they only had 2 plates on each side. This, of course, was immediately followed by a rush to the plate loaded press where they put 3! plates on each side and acted like it was about to crush them from all the weight.

    This was probably one of the funniest 1.5 hours i've ever spent in a gym. I had no idea people like this existed and I can't wait to see more because I KNOW this is just the beginning.

    As a side note, I sure did get a lot of stares when I was doing full squats at 225.

    I got even more when I was DL the 270. This probably had something to do with the Arnold grunting I wasn't able to control. That, and it was nearing 6 o'clock so it was starting to get full. I really don't think anyone expected me to lift it...

    I can't wait until Friday. It's gonna be biblical.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
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    Ah, these gym stories never get old. I hope you'll keep them coming.

  3. #3
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    Nov 2009
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    Atascocita, TX
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    Quote Originally Posted by JCavin View Post
    I can't wait until Friday. It's gonna be biblical.

    Get done early, then shoot some video. Maybe it could be a documentary.

    tim

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
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    I'm really jealous. I wish I had weightlifting skits between sets.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
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    Weymouth, MA
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    At least it sounds like they weren't using a mixed grip on their DL's. There are so many guys at my gym who use the mixed grip no matter what weight they are pulling. I've seen guys using it for 135lbs. and it makes me want to kick them in the nuts.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
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    106

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    Quote Originally Posted by Paul Sousa View Post
    At least it sounds like they weren't using a mixed grip on their DL's. There are so many guys at my gym who use the mixed grip no matter what weight they are pulling. I've seen guys using it for 135lbs. and it makes me want to kick them in the nuts.
    Mental note: don't go to Paul's gym but if I do wear a cup

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
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    Weymouth, MA
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    I swear to God though, it takes all my willpower to not have constant outbursts at the crap I see. The other night I saw a skinny kid on the decline bench doing 1/2 to 1/4 reps with 75 lb. to failure. I feel like I need to bring Starting Strength tracts like I'm a street strength evangalist.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
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    Nashville, TN
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    1,231

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    Quote Originally Posted by JCavin View Post
    ...they are putting their last load on the bar as well.
    Dude, get the fuck out of there now.

    -s.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
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    Fayetteville, Arkansas
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    Haha!

    Well, we WERE right next to the room with all the female cyclists...

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
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    Fayetteville, Arkansas
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    starting strength nutrition camp
    And, yeah, i'm gonna keep them coming.

    I've been taking notes in my workout log about the crap I see. There is literally that much ridiculous shit that happens.

    And this was all in my first night... I'm seriously considering staying late one day to just watch what else can happen.

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