Homophobic comments aside, as far as I know, every culture has developed some form of grappling as a sport/martial art. Moreover, boys wrestling one another (with no need for a score keeper) is a common occurrence, even if just for fun and not training for serious sport, just as it is common to see my two dogs or two cats wrestle with one another, or for that matter seeing animals of other species wrestle as a form of play and as form of domination.
Frankly, one of the main deterrents to wrestling "catching on" like soccer isn't so much the homophobic reactions that you have, but rather the fact that wrestling is a combat sport and happens to be, at least in my personal opinion, the toughest sport there is. Most people aren't cut out for the demands of wrestling, even at a fairly low level. Obviously, just like weightlifting, it also doesn't have popularity for other reasons (not a lot of people enjoy watching it when compared to things like soccer or basketball). But I doubt what is holding wrestling back from achieving greater popularity isn't because it is "gay".
Wrestling is really only unpopular (in the USA) compared to Football, Baseball, and Basketball. Just a month ago the NCAA D1 tournement was held in Philly and it sold out. It also got semi-live coverage on ESPN on a saturday evening. As illustrated by USAW/USAWrestling membership it is much more popular than Weightlifting. Wrestling is very popular internationally. I don't have any stats but across eastern europe and eurasia interestingly fairly poor parts of the world, it is very popular. From what I understand these are the parts of the world Weightlifting is popular. On a side note. Wrestling is most popular in poorer I'll say more blue collar areas of the country like the Lehigh Valley and Western PA, and Iowa.
you make some great points. here in central pa (and pa as a whole) high school wrestling is very popular..and ask anybody, they'll tell you its the best in the nation, and its probably true. The popularity is present in both blue collar and more well funded areas (central dauphin hs is suburban harrisburg won the last 2 state titles). About the only place wrestling isn't thriving in Pa is the inner city schools, where, you guessed it, basketball is much bigger. The mid atlantic wrestling federation (MAWA) holds tournaments all spring throughout PA, NY, MD and VA, all the way from middle school age to an open tournament, and draw very well.
On the other hand, weightlifting around here is non existent. I doubt anyone even knows what a snatch is. The funny thing is (well maybe not funny) in our rural, economically beaten up area (that i love dont get me wrong), steroid use is very prevalent among "lifters" esp. in the high school and college age range. When i say lifters I mean bench, biceps, and shrugs crew. No oly lifters, no one squats to depth, no one deadlifts. But we have 17 year olds in the gym at the Y that look like you could stick a needle in them and they would deflate.