Subby, yes, my T test came back at 300 ng/dL and free just shy of 6 ng/dL. Those are sleep-deprived numbers. I'm trying to be as disciplined about sleep as I am about workouts. Not anti-TRT - just trying to knock down everything within my control first.
I caught a glimpse of my own slouched posture in a mirror, like Mark H. suggested. I stuck my chest out, tucked my chin and pulled my shoulders back. It felt arrogant, but when I looked in the mirror, my head and spine were aligned properly.
My goal here isn't to do a complete 180 and start picking fights over inconsequential things. I just want to be a little more prepared, because in the past some people have taken advantage of my good nature and I don't want to be vulnerable to that anymore.
In my experience, increased aggression doesn't manifest itself that way. Think of it more like increased assertiveness and confidence as opposed to active aggression.
I had a client who had similar issues, and when he improved that aspect of his life, he wasn't like a machoman asshole. He just stood up for himself more. He didn't let his doctor push him around or take treatments he was hesitant about. He did his own research and talked to other medical professionals to make his own decisions about his life.
I've never been a very confident lifter. It's more like acceptance than confidence. It's like "this is what I need to do, so I'm going to do it."
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I spent some years in some aggressive martial arts classes. Arnis de Mano, Kenpo and some Indonesian knife fighting classes. That will do the trick... You could probably do it more quickly in Krav Maga classes.
The day you realize how easy it can be to kill or injure gravely, you will be able to be nice to even the most rude of people.
Agreed. Spend your time learning very basic techniques that can be taught to and utilized by reasonably heathy people as opposed to the esoteric BJJ crap:
1) Distance management.
2) A good double leg takedown.
3) Punch protection and mitigation techniques (develop a good guard and cross mount)
4) Techniques for getting the fight to the ground where your advantages are generally maximized.
5) Energy conservation and breathing.
6) Maybe a few armlocks.
These very basic skills can be learned in six months by reasonably fit "average" people and will give you a fighting chance in many if not most street confrontations. Don't make the mistake of thinking you're going to learn too much in a month. BJJ schools are great at convincing people that you will.
And here's some free advice for women. I realize that there are some valid reasons for women taking women's classes, but unless you believe that your biggest threat is getting attacked by other weak women, it's not a good idea IMHO. I've seen women learning knife defenses in women's classes. Good luck with that waste of time. And I'm not saying it doesn't happen but I've never seen female cops train in women's classes.
Oh yeah, and get as physically strong as you possibly get. People selling BJJ classes will falsely tell you that strength isn't important in Jiu-jitsu. Don't believe that hype. Women need to know this fact as well. Women's classes often teach all kinds of BS like this. Yeah, a small, weak person studying dilligently for years, perhaps at the advanced blue belt and above level may get to a point where a high skill level will greatly overcome significant physical limitations but do yourself a favor. Train for strength. You'd be amazed how deadlifts and squats help in the all-important ground game. Strength, even in BJJ is a huge advantage. You might find some useful information on how to acquire this.
Good luck.
Most of your post makes many excellent points. But 4) is a really bad idea in many crowded bars. As well as dark locations with possible broken glass, gravel, and rocks. Then there's the potential friends around to help stomp you on the ground. Not to forget the possible knife clipped to a pocket that might come out with no quick exit strategy when rolling prone.
These are complete strawman arguments, because in fighting, you have to diversify your options.
What you've stated is analogous to saying "oh you have a life raft, but what if you need to cut a rope in order to keep the boat from capsizing? The life raft would be useless. You need a knife. Ergo, don't stock a life raft."
The point behind learning to fight on the ground is so that if you end up on the ground, you have an advantage.
You realizing rolling on the ground, I might also have a knife or gun, right? You realizing that if I throw you on the ground and you land on broken glass, gravel, and rocks, you are going to be in much more trouble than me, right?
Every fight is different, and you have to use the skills you have fitting the situation. If your plan is "No one is every going to take me to the ground" that's not a robust plan.
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Ground and stand up are both disadvantaged with multiple attackers.
Most if not all fights will end up on the ground. Especially with untrained people.
If you can, pick a Bjj school that teaches the Torrance curriculum. My school did, and was more focused on self defense. A lot of clubs focus on sport and tournament jiu jitsu. There’s some value to it, but like Tyson said “until someone punches you in the face”
Jiu jitsu focused on sport is very different from self defense jiu jitsu. The techniques are the same. The mindset are not.