My Testosterone

[MBasic]

will derive a lot of pleasure from hearing about it.

I lol'd

[Dave Joksimovic]

A serious question for the OP: have you seriously considered suicide? Dr. C has correctly pointed out that you have a short time to live anyway, and if your posting history on these boards is any indication, your quality of life is already very low. End it. You'll leave more of an estate for whatever relatives you may have that have not completely disassociated with you, and we will derive a lot of pleasure from hearing about it.

Holy. Balls.

[MBasic]

Posting on this site is subject to the following rules, terms, and conditions, and violation of these rules is cause for immediate suspension or termination of posting privileges without notice.

1. Personal attacks will not be tolerated anywhere on the website, including E&P.
   
2. Abusive or defamatory PMs will result in immediate account deletion.
   

Since we cannot be everywhere at the same time, responsible members of the community are encouraged to report offending posts. Only posts after this policy implementation should be reported.

While Jordan is reluctant to provide a diagnosis, I am not similarly constrained. I play a doctor sometimes in my room at home. Sit down because I have some news for you:

You have the AIDS. Not just a little bit, either. The full blown type. Full-Blown AIDS, or FBA, is what you have. Also, the diabeetus. You have that, too. Having seen your numbers above, I can safely say that your diabeetus is not trivial, either. You have Wilford Brimley-level diabeetus.

I suspect you have no more than 6 months to live before your T-cells finally get digested by the harmful gut parasites you picked up from eating bread, coupled with your high levels of circulating blood glucose. Glucose actually kills NKTs. Sugar is poison, bro. Your RNA will unzip your DNA and then, well, it is all over.

To preserve what little quality of life remains for you, there is only one option: Immediate cessation of posting on this board. It is the only way. Best of luck to you. I hope you can gather the scraps of your life together before you gut becomes overly leaky.

Yours in health,

Dr. Timithus Campitulip, MD, BS, GTP, PTA, XCR, CAT, DOG, BDD

A serious question for the OP: have you seriously considered suicide? Dr. C has correctly pointed out that you have a short time to live anyway, and if your posting history on these boards is any indication, your quality of life is already very low. End it. You'll leave more of an estate for whatever relatives you may have that have not completely disassociated with you, and we will derive a lot of pleasure from hearing about it.

Mods, please delete TomC's & MarkR's account per the new rules.
These are unwarranted personal attacks in a legitimate thread.

[Jordan Feigenbaum]

Mods, please delete TomC's & MarkR's account per the new rules.
These are unwarranted personal attacks in a legitimate thread.

I actually don't think the thread is legitimate for all reasons I've pointed out in this thread. So, I guess Rip and Tom are safe.

[Aaron Montgomery]

I actually don't think the thread is legitimate for all reasons I've pointed out in this thread. So, I guess Rip and Tom are safe.

Ah, but the new rules state that, "Personal attacks will not be tolerated anywhere on the website, including E&P." So, it would seem that either:
1. personal attacks are tolerated in some places on the website by some people
or
2. your subforum is not considered a part of the website.

Is there a legitimate third option?

[Brodie Butland]

Mods, please delete TomC's & MarkR's account per the new rules.
These are unwarranted personal attacks in a legitimate thread.

I respectfully disagree. They are posts intended to ratchet up the absurdity level even more than it has already reached with Carni, which is a very high bar in itself. Neither this thread nor any of the threads Carni has posted for the past six months have been legitimate--they're intended to shit-stir and waste time. Occasionally dude writes something relevant related to his lifting, but that's a very infrequent exception.

And dude...if you really hate this forum, just leave. Really. I don't see what it is with the pariah complex that you all over at your shadow forum seem to have--I thought the purpose of that forum was to escape this one, not obsess over every time Rip posts something you don't like. Your time would be better spent coming up with more clever ways to make fun of my last name, because what you all have come up with thus far pretty much played out when I was in first grade.

[Mark Rippetoe]

will derive a lot of pleasure from hearing about it.

I lol'd

Mods, please delete TomC's & MarkR's account per the new rules.
These are unwarranted personal attacks in a legitimate thread.

I guess he reconsidered his lol-ing. He apparently consulted with his handlers. Suicide by cop? I think so.

[hamburgerfan]

I respectfully disagree. They are posts intended to ratchet up the absurdity level even more than it has already reached with Carni, which is a very high bar in itself. Neither this thread nor any of the threads Carni has posted for the past six months have been legitimate--they're intended to shit-stir and waste time. Occasionally dude writes something relevant related to his lifting, but that's a very infrequent exception.

And dude...if you really hate this forum, just leave. Really. I don't see what it is with the pariah complex that you all over at your shadow forum seem to have--I thought the purpose of that forum was to escape this one, not obsess over every time Rip posts something you don't like. Your time would be better spent coming up with more clever ways to make fun of my last name, because what you all have come up with thus far pretty much played out when I was in first grade.

Rip gets to complain on his forum when someone says something he doesn't like. Hell, he does it all the time. Why do the rest of us have to play by different rules?

[DeanT]

Your time would be better spent coming up with more clever ways to make fun of my last name, because what you all have come up with thus far pretty much played out when I was in first grade.

Since this thread has been in the crapper since post one, I'd really like you to regale us with all of the "no doubt" awesome assaults on your last name. Are we ever too old for 1st grade humor?

[Jordan Feigenbaum]

Rip gets to complain on his forum when someone says something he doesn't like. Hell, he does it all the time. Why do the rest of us have to play by different rules?

I mean, it is HIS forum so....