No disrespect taken... isn't this supposed to be a place of constructive conversation, after all?
In your first quote above you state if you raise your hips in your current setup, you'd be more horizontal and your shoulders would then pass too far in front of the bar. I completely agree with this in my response (see above). Raising your hips without making your shins more vertical WILL push your shoulders too far forward (I could have been clearer on this in my response) or push your back into lumbar and/or thoracic extension to maintain balance.
Yes, your shins are not vertical. In my opinion, however, I believe they should be more vertical than they are. This will allow you to keep your hips high. In relation to the floor, the angle of the shin is created at the ankle joint. In order for the shin angle, relative to the floor to change, we must plantar-flex the foot at the ankle. I feel this is wasted effort in the deadlift if the shin angle relative to the floor is too great. We might as well be squatting, then. Remember, squats are for the legs; deadlifts are for the back (even though they both get trained in both lifts).
At any rate, I digress... your initial question was in regard to the eccentric portion of the lift and I've not addressed that one time so far. I think it looks good, but like David mentioned, the decent may degrade with higher intensity and volume.