Getting a friend onboard the strength train

[Amos k.]

Hallo all,

I have a friend which is dealing with a back injury right now and waiting for diagnostics before taking any sort of physical activity.
Also since forever, he had the misconceptions that:
- He is skinny, fragile and not meant to "lift heavy weights".
- Barbell exercises are not for "people like him".
- Dead-lifts and Squats are dangerous for the back.
- Strength training is not for him (but bench press along with 15 different exercises for upper body are.. ).
- Legs are probably for running.

In addition, every little pain in the past deterred him from proceeding in any activity or advancing in the weights of the exercises.


This time he stated himself that he wants to pick up exercising again, for real now after his injury, and i want to get him on Starting Strength for at least 2-3 months before he dismisses it or not.

I am an advocate for strength training in general and Starting Strength in particular to my environment, acknowledging that we are all novices of some sort..
How can i work through the above mentioned misconceptions and barriers of my friend and get him committed on a strength training routine?

I've tried several times in the far past but he has always regressed back to "comfort" or not doing anything.
How do you think i should approach him?


Thanks a lot in advance.

[Mark Rippetoe]

Since your attempts at education and persuasion have failed, I think you should kidnap the guy. Force him to behave the way you want him to, and kill him if he doesn't. After all, it's for his own good.

[Will Morris]

Hallo all,

I have a friend which is dealing with a back injury right now and waiting for diagnostics before taking any sort of physical activity.
Also since forever, he had the misconceptions that:
- He is skinny, fragile and not meant to "lift heavy weights".
- Barbell exercises are not for "people like him".
- Dead-lifts and Squats are dangerous for the back.
- Strength training is not for him (but bench press along with 15 different exercises for upper body are.. ).
- Legs are probably for running.

In addition, every little pain in the past deterred him from proceeding in any activity or advancing in the weights of the exercises.


This time he stated himself that he wants to pick up exercising again, for real now after his injury, and i want to get him on Starting Strength for at least 2-3 months before he dismisses it or not.

I am an advocate for strength training in general and Starting Strength in particular to my environment, acknowledging that we are all novices of some sort..
How can i work through the above mentioned misconceptions and barriers of my friend and get him committed on a strength training routine?

I've tried several times in the far past but he has always regressed back to "comfort" or not doing anything.
How do you think i should approach him?


Thanks a lot in advance.

Is it worth completely losing your friendship for?

[Gbraddock]

Questions: how’d he injure his back? What symptoms? How might a stronger back and posterior chain mitigate the recurrence of the injury? What is his current testosterone level? He needs to check it!

Otherwise, sounds like he may have an extreme mental picture of the strength training “guy” as some burly fat guy with a bunch of chalk everywhere grunting and ripping 600lbs off the floor. All of this while wearing a singlet looking outfit LOL.

Maybe help him understand a REASONABLE approach can be taken to strength training with these movements (squat, deadlift, bench press, press, clean) which can safely produce increases in strength/protection of joints. Someone like him may appreciate the academic side of the proper execution of the movements. It’s a FAR SUPERIOR way to attack the aging process IMO.

If not, screw it...take him out; he may serve as a decent protein source for you. Just know you May take on his animal spirit LOL

[Amos k.]

Since your attempts at education and persuasion have failed, I think you should kidnap the guy. Force him to behave the way you want him to, and kill him if he doesn't. After all, it's for his own good.

I laughed out loud

Anyway, this is not the case, certainly not "losing his friendship".
Instead, since his injury i feel a positive draft from his side regarding wanting to get into a good routine.. unfortunately he lives now in a different country so i cannot just take him with me to the gym and get him started.

Just thought maybe one of you encountered a similar situation and/or managed to persuade someone out of his misconceptions and into the routine.

[IlPrincipeBrutto]

How do you think i should approach him?

My two cents: you shouldn't.
You cannot foist strength training on people more than you can convince them to change their deep-held beliefs.
You can be an example and you can give them information *when and if they ask for it*, but not much more than that.
Only they can decide they want to change, and doing so requires first to acknowledge that they were 'wrong' in the first place; this is a very hard process over which you have very little influence. In fact, it' so hard that the most people will never undertake it, let alone finish it.

IPB

[Nockian]

The most I offer these days is "heavy deadlifts can be good for sorting out bad backs". If they pick up on it and want to know more, then fine, if they don't, equally fine.

My Brothers wife was round for Boxing Day lunch. She is a typical weak runner with multiple physical issues due to that weakness. She swears that she cannot squat :rollereyes: so I asked if she could manage to bend down and pick something off the floor, which she could.
"Then there's nothing to stop you deadlifting" Said I.
At which point the excuses began to flow and I so I utilised the recent forum advice "oh that sucks, I'm going to get another slice of roast beef".

[Jorosi]

I’d show him the Brian Jones testimonial video, then if his interest is piqued, tell him about the book.

[Paulbfast]

Tell him deadlifts will enable him to pull up his pants someday!

[Frankie]

I have bought so many copies of books for people over the years only to later find them covered in dust and barely opened except to look at the pictures. I have come to believe that Lifters are born, not made.